So I have been pretty bad at updating the website, and not only that, I have been writing show descriptions that are far far to long. This show description is of no exception to that current trend. Perhaps it will be the last "epically" long show description, I mean, who reads through the whole show described in text? It must just sound like the ramblings of an old man describing his strange dreams... Anyways, enjoy.
The suggestions: british soldier + supermarket
A market that is super, it has flashing lights, it has a roller disco, it has ipads on every shelf, it has big screen tvs.
We meet Charles about to go off to war to fight for the British. His fiance doesn't want him to go. He promises to write everyday.
We meet Henry and Prudence, two old folks who meet on a park bench and complain about the new supermarket that has replaced the old one. They decide to do something about it.
Charles off at war is a terrible war strategist and refuses to have his soldiers use boats to cross the river, his unit mutinies (sort of) and he is convinced to go on and cross the river himself to prove his bravery.
At the supermarket we meet the manager/boss who is quiet mean to Bobby the worker (who is moping up some spilled milk and makes a joke to his boss). The boss seems to be obsessed with nobody spilling anything.
The old couple enter the supermarket and are actually quiet impressed with all the flash and hoopla that “super” offers (like 4000 varieties of tea).
Charles meets up with the commander of the enemy (played with an outrageously ambiguis accent) and they realize that they aren't that different. In fact, they realize that they have been lied to by their Queen and their King to manufacture this war in the first place. Did I mention that the war was about fashion? Well, it was.
Back at home, his fiance has received word that Charles is missing and has been convinced by her drunk of a mother that he is dead. She gives up and starts to drink, settling into a life of slipping into her mother's deadly habits.
Henry and Prudence decide that all this hate is not worth it and agree that the supermarket isn't all that bad. Henry asks Prudence to the Roller disco to dance and Prudence admits that she just wanted to do that right form the beginning. Henry, a miserable old man, had happiness and love right in front of him the whole time.
The two military commanders decide to try and end the war by tricking the Queen and the King into going on a date together. They decide to write each of them love letters and then disguise themselves as the restaurant staff to make sure their ruse works.
There is a roller disco wedding officiated by the poor mop boy Bobby and the sight of it melts the mean hearted boss.
The Queen of England and the King of “Ambiguous European Nation” of course fall in love and end their petty squabble.
Charles returns home and rescues his fiance from the clutches of her poisonous mother.
And all is well in the land of CRUMBS.
